Jay is the Spring 2022 OYES Travel Award recipient, sponsored by friends of OYES.
My name is Jay Cimineri, and I am an autistic, transgender equestrian residing in the small town of Milton, Wisconsin. I received the Winter 2022 Platinum Stables Hunter Jumper Excellence Award, and I am truly thankful for the opportunity. This spring, I am hoping to receive more financial assistance to afford numerous shows this summer, along with starting training at a new barn.
I have been riding since I was a bright-eyed first grader and haven’t stopped since. After bouncing between many breeds along with numerous disciplines, I have discovered my admiration for the Arabian breed and working western disciplines. I have never met a kinder soul than one of the Arabian. This upcoming show season I am riding my trainer’s Arabian gelding, Chewbakka Bahim. Our goals for this season are to simply try our hardest at every show and enjoy my final year in the Junior division. Winning a few high points wouldn’t be bad, though!
I have many struggles with “fitting into” the equestrian community. I’m transgender, autistic, and I have numerous mental illnesses that have caused me immense hurdles in becoming a successful equestrian. With being diagnosed with autism in March of 2022, I understand myself more and why I have always felt like the odd one out. Of course, a diagnosis won’t fix everything, but it will help me learn more about my conditions and how to handle my issues in a better manner than before.
This applies to being an equestrian since I get very overwhelmed and have meltdowns frequently at shows. To an outsider, it looks like I’m being dramatic over not winning or my horse not performing as I asked, but that is far from the truth. It comes down to tiny things that set me off; whether it be the way my clothing feels, the humidity, noise levels, etc., these things affect me greatly at shows. I’ve been looked down upon frequently for these episodes I can’t control. I am getting much better, but it still happens regularly. I also have PTSD from falling off horses at shows, which affects my performance and confidence. I am working on these problems this show season, but it still is very frustrating and makes me feel helpless.
The judging from others for being transgender also harms my mental health. I have seen numerous online posts from equestrian peers calling the LGBTQ+ community vile names and supporting hate. I feel uncomfortable at shows knowing I’m being judged for who I am and parts of me that I can not control. Some days I don’t even think I can show up and compete from the paranoia that my competitors despise me for my gender identity.
My previous scholarship helped me buy show chaps, a western saddle blanket, an English saddle pad, and pay for one open show. I am deeply grateful for everything OYES has done for me. I am trying to connect with my mentors as well. This spring/summer, the scholarship would help me afford my last year in the Junior division, along with making the jump to a new training facility. My trainer has let me know she plans on staying at college next summer, so my riding career with her and Chewie will sadly end this year. Chewie is my heart horse without a doubt, but his owner doesn’t currently offer lessons.
This means I need to find a new stable, preferably an Arabian or Morgan facility, to better my riding skills and advance my equestrian career. All Arabian/Morgan stables near me are about an hour away, so the scholarship would help pay for the travel fees. Currently, I can not justify the gas fees to train with these facilities, especially as I am unemployed due to my physical health issues and autism. I had to quit my job at a boarding facility due to extreme joint and ligament pain/instability, which I am currently looking into diagnoses and treatments for. My pain gets worse by the day, sometimes to the point where I can’t even open a door or turn on a light switch. I can’t seem to find a job that won’t hurt my body even more and also be fitting with my autism and anxiety. Being an equestrian is an expensive hobby, and I am only able to keep riding because my parents are helping financially.
Career-wise, I am most interested in a career with horses. I am deliberating on whether I should
attend college for equine science or not. If I decide to attend college for this specific path, I plan on attending UW-River Falls. My current trainer is a student in their equestrian science program and loves it. I am also considering veterinary lab work. The science of breeding and foaling greatly interests me. I am also looking into college programs for this path, but I am unsure of which to choose and how to accomplish these goals. Regardless of college, I want to move back to the East Coast, as I grew up there. I’ve found that the Midwest just isn’t for me. I need to decide which state is right for me and find active horse organizations.
Lately, a vast majority of adults in my life are discouraging me from pursuing my goal of acquiring a career with equines. This has become hurtful and invalidating. I have been told
countless times there is no way I will ever be able to live off of horses, but it’s what my heart is telling me to do. No other career path even remotely interests me. I will be connecting with my mentors to get advice on making a career out of my passion for horses.
Despite my many struggles over the years, I have never once quit riding or working with horses. I have found they are my one true passion. The reward of creating a bond with an animal is one I will never take for granted. I can tell this point in my life comes to a fork in the road, and I need to take a leap to continue bettering my knowledge and riding. Assistance from OYES will help me greatly in achieving my goals as an equestrian. I appreciate everything this wonderful organization has done for both me and other equestrians!